December 11, 2012

My dearest,

Remind me to be wary the next time you start a sentence with “We’ve never had a…”

“We’ve never had a Christmas tree,” you say.

“Okay,” I say.

“Let’s go get one,” you say.

“Okay,” I say.

So we go to a Swedish furniture store to look for Christmas trees.

“These fake trees are so ugly,” you say.

“These trees are real,” I say.

“They’re not!” you say.

“They are real — that’s why they need to be sprayed with water,” I say.

“They’re real?” you ask, still not quite convinced.

“They’re real,” I say.

“No wonder they’re so ugly!” you say.

“…”

Yours, ever and always.